Breakfast at the Blairs 7

August 21, 2006

Mr B is shaking a battered short wave radio set that’s emitting groaning noises reminiscent of Prime Minister’s question time while the Barbados Spinners croon the popular Cliff Richard number ‘Just Don’t Say Goodbye’ on the terrace.
Mr B For God’s sake get someone to shut those guys up.
Mrs B But you asked for that song.
Mr B I know I did but it’s the fifth time they’ve played it today already. Why can’t I get the BBC on this damn thing?
Mrs B (giggling) try fiddling with the little knob, darling, I can show you how.
radio splutters into life…..serious failure of authorities.. very serious allegation…….worst crisis for over 100 years …..Pakistan….President Musharraf
Mr B What the hell is going on? Why wasn’t I told?
Mrs B Well, you are on holiday, darling.
Mr B Yes, but this is a national crisis, I should be there, in the public eye, making sombre statements on tv without being interrupted by that Paxman bastard….
Mrs B Oh, I’m sure Mr P will be doing your job for you quite well. You’re not irreplaceable, you know.
Mr B This is outrageous. Where’s the bloody phone?
Mrs B One of the boys is on it, there’s a new girl-friend so better not interrupt.
as Mr B is about to give a passable impression of suicide bomber exploding, the radio finally comes through loud and clear “The final match of the series was the first Test in the history of cricket to be forfeited after umpires….”
Mrs B What’s the matter, dear, did England get beaten again?

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