October 8, 2006
POLICE swooped on a gran of two for not throwing back a neighbour’s football. Angela Hickling, 56, was arrested then had her photograph, fingerprints and DNA taken. Police spent several days taking statements. Officers scoured her garden and rifled through drawers and cupboards after neighbour Christopher Salisbury claimed she had kept the ball. She insists it never landed in her garden.
Meanwhile, another grandmother aged 81 stunned wheel clampers by grabbing a lump hammer from her car and wrecking their van. “I felt ten years younger,” she said.
It’s clear that it’s not teenage yobs and hoodies that are the menace in our society, but grannies. Or is that setting up and defining too much a ’self’ and ‘other’, Ms Butts?
Another report claims that ‘THREE out of four pensioners would like to try extreme sports on action-packed holidays. Retired post office worker Nancy Evans, 71, from Devon, said: “I have parachuted. Next year I want to go tornado chasing in America.”‘
Top 3 holidays for oldies: 1. Skydiving’ 2. Shark cage diving’ 3. Scuba-diving.
Watching grannies jumping out of planes might be fun for those in the plane but the only extreme sport I’m into is extreme avoidance of anything that can be labelled a sport. Quote of the day (thanks to Mr Eugenides:
“The only exercise I get is following the coffins of friends who exercised”
– Peter O’Toole